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Your Hand In Mine

After a fortnight of no human contact in the 10 foot cell Harlow Haleyis released from solitary at midnight.

He is roughly handled by a corporal who pushes him into the prisoner barracks without a word. The first person he goes to is his brother.  Harlow is weak, he’s humiliated and he is done. He can’t play by their rules anymore.

The prisoner barracks consist of   a large tent crammed with cots and  secured with padlocks at night.  It’s typically pitch black in the tent, but Harlow notices lanterns have been placed on the edges, giving the room a soft glow.

The silence is also new.

For the past month they’d been filled with withdrawal panic attacks and  nightmares. Harlow never took enough of anything to fully experience the ugliness of withdrawal, but he’d held on to a headache for the first few days.

Harlow quietly tiptoes around the sleeping men in the cots until he finds Alex in the corner , curled up right next to one of the lanterns. Moths are dancing across his delicate nose and Haley just wants to snap it the fuck off.  This is all Alex’s fault and Harlow intends to make him pay.

Harlow moves to sleep beside his brother, and Alex turns around startled with a small piece of glass in his hand.

“Oh! Harlow you scared me,” Alex whispers.

“Now, what are you doing with that?,” Harlow whispers back. “Is someone trying to hurt you, Lexy ?”

Alex regards Harlow with his eyes, making sure he hasn’t been hurt.

 “….Greene died,” Alex whispers

“Who ?,” Harlow says disinterested

“ Greene. You know… the boy with the curly hair who you made eat that bug. Someone assaulted him in the middle of the night. Green said he was going to tell and the next night he was suffocated to death.  It was dark, so no one knows who it was. They installed the lanterns the next night and  it’s been quiet…but  I think when someone gets bored they’ll come after me.”

Harlow knew for a fact someone would eventually attack his brother , in fact he expected it. After the now dead idiot Greene, Alex was the youngest one here. Then Felix and Marco and then probably himself.  But Harlow had proven himself as not a victim and since Alex was with him Alex was safe now that he was back. Because if someone was going to hurt his brother, Harlow wanted to make sure he got something out of it.

Harlow was surprised Felix and Marco hadn’t started any fights to show people not to fuck with them.

He was a little disappointed.

He laughs a little to himself when he realizes he had inadvertently caused Greene’s death. Harlow had made the boy look weak before they even set foot in here and he’d been a victim ever since.

“Are you okay ?,” Alex asked, noticing the hint of a smile.

“No,” Harlow answered. Harlow hated everyone, but mostly, he hated himself and being left alone with himself has been torture. He deserved better. Every hour he reminded himself how smart he was and how dumb the RLA officers were.

They never checked on him and there was a high window in his cell. He stacked his shoes on top of each other and was able to peek out the window and watch the officers and soldiers.

He’d planned his escape.

He was done

***

At breakfast, Harlow was the main attraction. All eyes turned to see how he had survived the punishment. The broken skin on his now pale  body  had healed over into stinging scars and he’d lost a few pounds in confinement, but he didn’t let it show.

He found a seat next to Mayfield, a small time drug dealer and pickpocket Harlow had befriended in his last stay in Reno County Juvenile Facility.

Mayfield  typically followed the rules, but he was a slave to his addiction. He was also the horniest guy Harlow knew. He’d single handedly caused a small ghonerrera outbreak at their last jail. He also had asthma. And while Harlow would have preferred someone with diabetes, he would do.

“You gone crazy ?,” Mayfield asks Harlow when he sits.

“Always,” Harlow replies with a good natured smile. He spies Marco and Felix getting their requisite cup of cold cereal and one piece of fruit and beckons them over to the table. They come over quickly with eager smiles.

“Man, Harlow that was fucked up what they did to you,” Marco says  and Felix quickly agrees.

Harlow shrugs and takes Marco’s banana biting into it.

“I’m getting out of here today,” he says casually. “I thought I’d let you guys in so you’d know how I did it.”

“Why me ?,” Mayfield asks. 

“Because I need you to be a distraction,” he continues. “Before lunch I need you to have an asthma attack so bad you can’t stand. They’ll have to drive you to the infirmary and you’ll snatch a car key off someone’s belt. All the officers have the same  skeleton key for the cars.”

“Fuck no. I’m not holding on to a hot key,” Mayfield says

“Come on, don’t be a pussy. It won’t be for long,” Harlow explains. “ You can just drop it near the infirmary door. I’ll come running to get it, tell the officers I know what medicine you take and you miraculously get better. Then after dinner I’ll take one of the cars--”

“They’ll notice you,” Marco says

Harlow shakes his head and bites into Felix’s apple.

“I’ll hide in the storage shed near the parking lot. Wait until lights out, and they think everyone is in the tent and their guards are down. They usually have an after meal drink and I’ll sneak out then. I’ll roll the car first, obviously.”

Felix just shakes his head, but he looks excited. “It’ll be amazing if you pull that off.”

“Sorry, buddy. I’m not helping you,” Mayfield says standing up to leave. “I can’t be in this.”

“Right,” Harlow said. “I forgot to mention what was in it for you.”

“What’s that ?,” Mayfield asks easing back down.

“You can fuck my brother,” he says. This causes Marco and Felix to stop and stare at Harlow. 

Mayfield smiles, but shakes his head no.

“I know you want to,” Harlow continues in a sing song voice. “And I’m 90% sure the motherfucker won’t give you anything.”

Mayfield scoffs.

“Right. So he can snitch on me. Your brother doesn’t want--”

“I never said he’d want to,” Harlow corrects.  I’ll just talk to him so he atleast keeps quiet.  I imagine that’s not a problem for you ?,”

Mayfield gives him a reluctant smile, but agrees.

***

Alex Haley is keenly aware there is something different about Harlow.

He starts the work day with a big apology, he addresses Corporal Hunter as sir, he does his work quietly and when someone makes an offhand comment about teaching a bitch a new trick Harlow ignores it. When Harlow’s friend, Mayfield  passes out  while digging, Harlow  offers to help, instead of laughing about it like Alex expects.

They inmates get one hour of “free time” after dinner where they could either go to the barracks, the latrine or the 30 foot radius outside the barracks. Their top options for activities included playing paper cards outside or begging an officer to let them call home.

Harlow typically spent this time watching everyone from a corner on the floor or if he was in a better mood, regaling Felix and Marco with stories of his sexual conquests, real and perceived.

Alex was usually nowhere to be found.  He’d made the mistake of telling  Harlow he sneaks to the kitchen to take a small handful of liquid soap to wash the dirt from his face and arms. It was less harsh than the lye soap in the latrines.

Like any other night, the kitchen appears empty, but before Alex can close the door behind him, he feels someone breathing over him. He turns expecting to see Harlow, but  is surprised to see Mayfield holding a lantern, creating stark shadows on his sickly face.

Before Alex  can explain, Mayfield closes the door and grabs Alex’s wrist pulling him close to his face.

“You tell your fucking brother that nurse bitch shoved a bunch of fucking tubes up my nose and down my throat. They even took my blood. I didn’t sign up for that shit.”

“Why don’t you tell him ?,” Alex asks, his voice shaking.

Mayfield responds by smashing the lantern and picking up the biggest piece of glass. He holds it up to Alex’s throat.

“You scream and I’ll stab you,” he threatens.

In the pitch black, he stumbles to the large refrigeration consoles and pushes Alex into the large, heavily lit walk in. Harlow had told Mayfield that after lights out the officers will come back to the kitchen for their hidden liquor before locking the door from the outside. Once it’s locked they’d be alone until morning.

 After only 10 minutes, the coolness of the refrigerator  makes Mayfield’s hand shake and Alex watches the glass on his neck closely. He wonders if they stay in here too long if they will die.

After half an hour they hear the sounds of rowdy officers liberating there hidden liquor from the kitchen.  They don't even notice the glass from Mayfield's lantern in the floor. Alex’s heart sinks when he hears them secure the door shut.

He knows this is Harlow. 

After breakfast, his brother had told him he should never tell on anyone no matter what. That if Greene had kept his mouth shut he’d still be alive. Alex finds it terrifyingly convenient advice.

He’d told him not to tell, but Harlow had never said anything about fighting.  Alex wasn’t stronger than Mayfield, but he was healthier.

As Mayfield opened the fridge door, Alex makes his entire body go limp, and slips out of Mayfield’s shaking grasp. Alex bolts to  other side of the kitchen, flicking on the lights.

 “What the fuck are you doing ? Harlow told me you’d cooperate!” he huffs.

When Mayfield tries to grab him, Alex ducks and moves out of the way, running to the other side of the kitchen.

The kitchen is small and Alex know he’ll never be able to undo the door lock  to get out. But right now all he wants to do is keep Mayfield chasing him.   He only has to run back and forth three times before Mayfield stops pursuing him.

The asthmatic man gets on his knees and leans against the floor his hand over his heart, wheezing:

“Fuck.ha.Fuck.ha.Fuck.ha.”

Alex goes to the door, and all Mayfield can do is watch through blurry vision as he uses a knife to  slowly cut through the wire lock. As the last lock chain falls, Alex turns to see Mayfield slumped on the ground.

***

-2-

M83 wait

Harlow waits in the empty storage shed for an hour. He eavesdrops on the RLA guards on break.  They are talking about cars in a way that interests Harlow. They don’t just talk about the cars he’d seen some of his bosses drive, but they spoke of expensive sex on wheels cars that were fast and cost more than their family house.

Harlow’s mostly-absent-but-still-good-for-somethings senator  father had arranged his first job for him as a taxi driver in Fort Perch so Harlow had a license ;  but the idea of owning a vehicle seemed extravagant. No one he knew owned a car.

Admiring the stolen key,  he decides the next thing he’d steal when he got home would be a car. He’d take Roxi out for the weekend and convince her to stop calling the courts on him.

The now sloshed guards finally make their way on foot back to their own barracks on  the other side of the camp. Harlow causally steps out from the shed and makes his way towards the pristine line of military vehicles. He ponders which one he will choose to deliver him from this place.

He pauses when he hears slow footsteps behind him, he turns to see Alex running towards him.

“Help!,” he’s shouting.

“No,” Harlow breaths.

Fuck.

FUCK

Harlow steps out to block  his brother, he wants nothing more than to knock him out cold,  but Alex  stops short of running into him. He  gives Harlow a distressed stare before shouting again.

 “Help!,” he shouts to the drunk corporals. “Please someone’s hurt!,”

The guards, who were once a significant distance away from the brothers. now stop. They’re no longer buzzed and laughing. They are all business again.

“No,” Harlow breathes again, he is so stunned by watching his plan fall apart he can’t even move.

The guards turn with their flashlights on and in those lights Harlow can see his return to camp.

“WHY, LEXY? WHY DO YOU FUCKING RUIN EVERYTHING FOR ME!,” Harlow screams to Alex.

And then he runs.

The guards are too far away to tackle  him.

Harlow races for one of the cars, he jumps into the driver’s seat and accelerates the engine.  He quickly gets it into drive and goes straight for the fence when he hears three shotsgo  into the tire.

Harlow scrambles for the automatic controls, but in the process loses control of the vehicle.

And then he loses his sense of gravity.

 The vehicle rolls twice and he can hear someone screaming. The impact of the car hitting ground, rushes over him, but he lands  on his back on a safety cushion. He expects it to hurt more than it does.

He’s okay.

Harlow  can still see the Fort Harmony exit and car or no car he is already gone.  He hoists himself out of the remains on the smashed car window  and runs for the fence. He’ll get home on foot if he has too.

Two more shots ring close and hot in his ear. The first one goes in his leg, he stumbles backward, twisting his ankle.  He sees Alex above him. The second bullet goes through Harlow’s head, into his skull, through his brain and out the other side. He is vaguely aware of Alex doing what he is always doing; Shouting Harlow’s name.

Harlow, no. Harlow, stop. Harlow, please. Harlow, I’m scared. Harlow, what do we do now ?

Harlow knows what he will do. He knows his brain will go before his heart in a matter of seconds. He is terrified of that second, but he will surrender.

 He doesn’t want to ask for forgiveness for their sins and his depravity. He’s fucking proud of who he is. Was. He imagines he can feel flames licking at his feet and screams of the dammed in his ears.

Harlow will surrender, but not before making sure Alex is as fucked up as he should be for fucking up his life. His precious baby brother is the reason Harlow is here, on the edge of the end.  If Alex had  just stayed home that night he would be fine.

“Harlow--,” Alex cries, his saltire chain is hanging off his neck and  dangles above Harlow’s head.

“It’s so hot,” Harlow lies. If anything he feels coolness as life leaves him. “I can hear the screams of the dammed--”

Alex kneels over him and starts a prayer for absolution and forgiveness and this enrages Harlow. His baby brother is trying to comfort him in his last second and Harlow actually feels a calm settling over him. But he would never let Alex know that.

“See you in hell, baby brother,” Harlow whispers and after two breathes, the coldness  of finality washes over him and the prayer evaporates off Alex’s lips.

---

A/N

This Week On Thing I’ve Googled That Will Get Me On An NSA List: How long can someone shot in the head stay alive for ?