2014

Merryhill Elementary School

Las Vegas, Nevada

-1-

Alex Haley loved Mrs. Archer’s 5th grade classroom. He felt a little guilty that this was only his second time visiting.

The theme was hot air balloons and she had a replica hot air balloon basket in the corner filled with books. He takes particular notice of the display board where the class roster was handwritten on Pinterest perfect hot air balloon cut outs made of craft paper and pom poms.

Mrs. Archer was older than their previous teachers and the PTA moms warned him she was somewhat traditional. It had taken two phone calls for her to understand the heads up e-mail Haley always sent at the beginning of each years explaining that Nova didn't have a mother. 

“Mr. Haley, I’m so glad you finally took the time to come see me. I was beginning to think you only existed on e-mail,” Mrs. Archer greets him congenially.

“I'm sorry I haven't been able to put in my volunteer hours. They eliminated a position at my job and it’s been insane, I just got off a 5 to 5 shift.”

“Oh, dear. And you’re a nurse ?”

“Yes, I work with children,” he smiles, gesturing to his Disney patterned pediatric scrubs.

“Now, I assume this visit is about the name issue ?”

“Yes,” Haley nods, “I know we have a lot of work to do but...something I believe in as a parent is affirming how my child wishes to identify. And I’d really like to work with you to extend that to the classroom--”

“As I told him, if students have a little nickname that’s fine. But I won’t be accepting it on assignments or referring to him by it. You named your son and it’s a lovely name.”

Haley's eyes once again fall to the hot air balloon class roster.

“I know its unconventional,” Haley says. “But I feel like he’s being singled out a little.”

“He’s not. I don’t allow any of my students choose  new names--”  

“Well except,  Courtlynn Simons goes by Corkie, Timothy Wilder goes by Wild,  um, William Milton goes by Tag. I don’t see how that’s different--”

“Those are family names. I’ve been an educator for 37 years and I’ll admit the children in this generation are…interesting. But there is such a thing as structure, which we both know he benefits from. In my experience, this is just more attention seeking behavior.”

Haley had thought the same thing when his son informed him over breakfast  that he was using a new name because he wanted to claim his own identity. He'd just shrugged and looked miserable when Haley asked him what brought the name change on.

It ate at Haley all day that his son might be suffering the same gender identity crisis he’d been having his entire life. He'd been ready to make an appointment with more therapists but the next day  his son was happy and bubbly as ever and Haley had thought it was a phase.

But almost a year later he was still using the name.

“We’ve been calling him Nova at home too.”

Ms. Archer sighs.

“Mr. Haley, you know your son has been a challenge in my classroom. He's either being combative and disruptive or falling asleep at his desk. And I don't need to tell you about the attitude he's given the school psychologist and special education teacher--”

“I know...his pediatrician and I just put him on new medication we're still figuring out. But that’s all a separate issue. This--”

“Mr. Haley I know what he wants but, as adults, we know we can’t always give children everything they want. If his behavior improves I can think about letting him use it--”

“Actually, no. With all due respect, my son has been attending this school since kindergarten,” Haley interrupts. “His kindergarten class had seven scholarship families in it and we are the only one left. That’s not a coincidence.

Merryhill says it values diversity and are LGBTQ affirming but you make no accommodations. We scholarship parents talked to each other. This school has a history of holding less privileged kids to a different standard and when families can’t meet it they just leave.”

She frowns.

“Mr. Haley, this is a private school for parents who want their kids to be here. If you have a problem with the way this school runs you are always welcome to try your luck with the public school--”

“ I respect you and the work you do, Mrs. Archer. But I think we are having a misunderstanding. I didn’t come here to ask you anything. I’m telling you. The name thing is non negotiable. If there are any behavior problems in your class, you can call me and tell me my son Nova is having a problem.”

 

***

 -2-

“Absolutely not,” Haley calls from the car window when he pulls into the condo parking lot.

Nova dejectedly backs away from the edge of the raised wheelchair lift that Haley was certain he’d been planning to jump from on his skateboard. Holland balanced on the curb with her skateboard, her phone aimed up at the wheelchair lift. Beside her was Brixton Matthews, Nova’s Merryhill classmate.

“Have you lost your mind ?,” Haley inquires when Nova runs down the condo stairs to meet him. “And where is your helmet—”

“I forgot it—"

“Do I need to show you those x-rays again—”

 “Ooh, yeah, can you show them to Brixton ? He didn’t get to see—”

“Yeah! Those picture with the messed up skulls were so cool!” Holland exclaims.

Haley sighs.

“It's getting late. Brixton, Holland, would either of you like to stay for dinner?” Haley offers.

“What are you having ?” Holland asks.

“Vegetable stir fry—”

 She pinches her face in disgust. “Ugh, pass.”

 “Would you like  a ride home ?”

“Nooo. It’s not even dark yet,” Nova protests.

“It’s a school night,” Haley reminds him. “And you and I need to have a little chat.”

Nova turns slightly gray and makes a prayer hands gesture to Holland who was scrolling through her camera app. “Please stay. Please, please, please.”

“No way, it’s pizza night,” she tells him like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “And if I’m not home when it gets there my cousins eat it all. Haley, my aunt said I can take the bus.”

Haley nods. She and Nova perform a complicated handshake they’d created before she skates off.

“I’ll e-mail you a song to put in the video edit!” Nova calls after her.

“Yeah, yeah,” she sighs, effortlessly gliding towards the bus stop.

“Call when you get home, Holland!,” Haley adds.

She gives him a thumbs up as she speeds up to meet the approaching bus.

Haley next turns to Brixton who was sending a text message on his phone. “My mom said she can pick me up in an hour.”

Haley nods and opens up the Volkswagen’s trunk. It was stuffed with grocery bags.

“Good. Okay, everybody grab a bag.”

While the boys get the groceries from the trunk he goes to the front seat and puts the nondescript package he’d picked up from his P.O. Box in his messenger bag. It contained a customized Fleshlight for Luce’s birthday next month. Haley had recently discovered online sex stores through the ads on the porn videos Luce always watched. 

His wallet hated him for it.

“Why do we have to eat all these vegetables ?” Nova whines, looking into each grocery bags as he slings it on his arm.

“My dad’s a vegetarian,” Brixton adds.

“Ew, that’s freaking disgusting.”

Brixton laughs.

Haley had become aware of the cliques developing at Merryhill and that his child was often left out of them. He'd dropped Nova off at a birthday party only for him to come back sulking because the other boys were staying for a sleepover he wasn't invited to. Nova had held Haley back from having words with the parents and  claimed he liked hanging out with Holland better than his classmates. They liked to record themselves skateboarding. Brixton recently showed an interest in joining them.

It was Brixton’s first time at the condo and even though the idea of Trish Matthews, Brixton’s mother, seeing their condo gave Haley hives--he liked seeing Nova with a Merryhill friend. Nova seemed to have no memory of playing boyfriend to Brixton in first grade.

Haley pushes open the door to the unit and finds Luce in the living room, still dressed and slumped over in his wheelchair with his suit jacket over his head.

Haley frowns.

Luce always changed and got into  bed after class, he couldn't stand the feel of his work clothes for more than a few hours.

Haley drops his bags and rushes to check Luce’s pulse before removing the jacket from his head. Luce lets out an agonizing cry.

“Luce ? Luce ? Are you okay ? What’s wrong ?” He notices dried vomit staining Luce’s shirt and looks to his son. “Nova, what’s wrong with him--”

“I don’t know he’s just been sleeping like that,” Nova says, hurrying to the kitchen with Brixton to drop their grocery bags. “He said he had a headache.”

“Luce ? Talk to me, baby,” Haley whispers, shaking him awake.

“Bad migraine,” Luce groans, shutting his eyes.

Haley turns to see Nova curiously opening the coffee ice cream he'd impulse bought.“Has he been  like this since he came home from work ? Why did you leave him like this ? I have my phone at work you could have called me or Imogen or--where is Sara--”

“She’s at the computer place, I think. We were outside. Nobody told me to do anything--”

“Nobody should have to, you know better than to just leave him when he's in pain,” Haley snaps. “You're always telling me you’re ready for more responsibility but you never show it. You know how to help him into bed. Come here, I’m going to show you again--”

“Dad, stop yelling at me—”

“—I’m not yell—”

“—My friend is here—”

“He’ll be fine on his own for 5 minutes. Brixton, honey, why don’t you help yourself to a bottled water out of the kitchen  ? Everything is fine.”

“Just leave me,”  Luce mumbles, moaning as Haley rolls the wheelchair into their bedroom, Nova following behind.

He places the wheelchair next to the bed and lowers the arms.

“Come towards me,” he instructs Luce, softening his voice. He tilts and drags him into the bed. He looks over to Nova. “See you, don’t even have to bear any of his weight. Anyone can do it, I showed you.”

“Fuck,” Luce curses when  Haley props him up to undress him. “Shit. It's in my neck too, Lex. The pain is--”

“I know, Luce,” he coos and turns to Nova. “Can you go in the bathroom and bring me some ibuprofen PM?”

“I need more than Advil…the pain,” Luce starts.

“The specialist said anything stronger will just make the migraine worse—"

“Need a new fucking neurologist... the asshole never does shit...feels like I’m being stabbed. Fuck!”

“When did this start ? Why didn't you tell Imogen ?”

“She had to go to clincals. It wasn't bad before, I thought I could handle i--”

“Here,” Nova says handing him the liquid ibuprofen from the bathroom.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” Haley says pushing the medication into the feeding tube. Luce grabs his arm. “You can go back with Brixton. Turn the lights off and close the door on your way out.”

Nova bounds off and Haley sits in the dark room rubbing Luce’s shoulder until the soft whimpers fade and Luce falls asleep. His grip on Haley’s arm loosens, leaving little half moons pressed into his skin.

When he is sure Luce is asleep, Haley  goes to take a shower as quietly as he can. He needed to get out of his work clothes. Just as he turns the water off he hears Luce stirring in bed. He quickly wraps a towel around his waist and hurries to the bed to see Luce's eyes clenched tight and tears streaming down his face.

“I can’t fucking do this,” Luce pants, writhing against the bed. “It’s never been this bad. I—I need one of Ma’s Ambien or some shit—God, I can’t even think it’s getting so fucking bad.”

“You can do more ibuprofen. I’ll see if I can pull some strings and get us an appointment with the new neurologist. It could be stress... you're doing too much.”

The community college had asked him to teach a third class and Haley never liked that idea.

“I can’t—I just need drugs. Fuck!” Luce screams at the sound of a knock on their bedroom door.

Haley crosses the room and whips open the door to find  Nova standing there. Haley steps out of the bedroom and closes the door quietly behind him because now he was about to yell.

 “Nova, what is wrong with you ? You know  Luce has a migraine. Why in the world would you think it’s a good idea to  knock on the--”

Haley’s eyes flick up at movement to his left and his heart stops when he sees Brixton’s mother standing in the living room. Their eyes lock. She looks scandalized and he didn’t know if it was because he was soaking wet and only wearing a towel or because the messenger bag he’d dropped to take care of Luce was still on the floor and the very adult package he’d picked up from his P.O. Box was sticking out.

He suddenly regretted tearing a corner of the discreet box while he was in the post office parking lot because Brixton’s mother was now staring directly at the hole in the box in an attempt not to stare at Haley.

“Brixton’s mom wanted to talk to you,” Nova says.

“Hi, Trish,” Haley smiles, tightening the towel around his waist. He always kept his small collection of tattoos covered around the PTA moms and he could feel 6 years of effort going down the drain.

“Oh, um, I-I just wanted to thank you for letting Brixton come over while I got my hair done,” she stammers.

“Sure, ahem, anytime.…it looks great—"

“Thank you I went to Aveda,” she smiles nervously. It was the salon he went to and suggested to the Merryhill mothers. “Um, Grayson told me your…well, I don’t know if you know this but my husband is a private practice internist so if you two ever need a second opinion on something--”

“I didn't know that. I’ll keep it in mind. Thank you.”

“Quite a few of the husbands are doctors actually…Okay, we should go.”

The moment they are out the door Haley walks to the window and watches her Mercedes go down the street before turning and snapping at his son.

“Nova--”

“Hey, if I had a cell phone I could have texted you--”

“Don’t even try it.” Nearly every conversation they had came back to him getting a phone. Haley just didn't understand why a 10-year-olds needed a smartphone when they had a computer. “Why would you leave the grocery bags I dropped just sitting here. Pick it up for me, okay ?”

When he comes back out, Nova had put one bag of groceries away before moving on to playing Mario Kart on the couch. Haley s climbs over the back of the couch, surprise attacking Nova from behind with a tackling hug. He peppers kisses on his face.  

“Daddy, stop! My game--,” Nova squeals, pushing him away

“I just want to show you I love you—”

“You’re so weird! Get off me!” he cries but he's laughing.

Haley untangles himself from his son and swipes his chin softly. “I haven’t see you all day, sweet boy. I missed you.”

“Do you want to see the videos Holland and I made ? I did a kick flip but then I—”

“Later,” Haley says, sitting up cross legged on the couch and taking the controller to pause the video game. “We need to talk. I spoke to Mrs. Archer today. She’s agreed to call you Nova—"

“Really? Oh my god, what did you say to her ?”

“We came to an understanding. I stuck my neck out for you so I need you to work on your classroom behavior--”

“I try but she has so many rules like we’re all babies. It's so boring, we have to just sit in our desks and listen for hours. She’s always bitching at me--”

“Um, excuse me ?”

“It’s not calling her the b-word—”

“I don't care. We don’t talk about our teachers like that. She gave me a copy of all the homework due this semester so every night you’re going to show me—”

“I want to use the iPad app. How come we can't get an iPad ?”

“You can use my laptop--”

“Everyone in my class has an iPad. They have iPads and a phone—"

“Maybe when you’re in intermediate school—"

 “Ugggh, do I have to go to Merryhill for 6th grade ? Why can’t I go to Holland’s school ?”

“I think you do better in smaller classes. And you get to see Dr. Farmer and your specialist--”

“They don't do anything, I hate seeing them. Mrs. Archer only sends me to them to punish me.”

“It's not a punishment.”

“ Brixton is literally my only friend at Merryhill, if he's not in all my classes next year I'll kill myself."  

“Sometimes all you need is one friend. I like Brixton,” Haley shrugs.

Nova picks up the lock of damp hair that rested on Haley'shoulder and absently braids the end.

“Do you think Brix’s dad can make Luce better? Brix said his Dad gets awards and stuff—"

“I don’t know.  But I won’t say no to another opinion.”

Especially if it’s free he thinks.

“But you know, Luce’s condition is chronic so it can’t really be cured. He’s  just having a bad flare up of symptoms--”

“Couldn’t they do like a transplant or something--”

“It doesn’t work like that with the brain…it’s why you always have to wear your helmet when you ride your bike or skateboard,” Haley smiles. “Now, do you want to show me the video you made before I make dinner ?,”

“Yeah,” he says. “But I think you’re going to be mad.”

---

Lol, this Fleshlight reference was originally in an earlier chapter and I took it out and put it here. I swear it was before Lile started posting Rogue.

 

Chapter 19 >>>