1999
North Las Vegas, Nevada
Virtue
Studios, Inc
-1-
A little after 2 a.m. a black Town Car drops Alex Haley off in front of Virtue Studios. His driver had been friendly, more curious than judgmental of what Haley had been up to that night.
Haley swings his overnight bag over his
shoulder and takes the stairs up to the studio apartment above Virtue that he
rented from his boss, Jean Dory. On his way up he can’t help but notice the light
coming from the Virtue production office.
His exhaustion from a night out turns to giddiness when he spots the Gateway boxes stacked in the middle of his apartment. Maxwell had never let him use his computer and Haley decided he wanted one of his own.
He showers and changes from his club clothes into a pair of violet cheerleader shorts and the bubblegum pink …Baby One More Time concert t-shirt. He and Minnow had made the last tour stop in Canada and it was his one good memory from last year.
He finger combs his damp hair, it hung to his chest now-- longer than it had ever been allowed to be. In a fit of bad decisions he’d had it permed but now, months later, it laid in the loose waves like how he’d always imagined.
Moving to the two burner stove
he packs the Moka pot with coffee grounds and watches it bubble up under the
heat. He pours the piping hot coffee into a floral mug, adds a pinch sugar, a generous pour of cream and tip toes back down the stairs to Virtue's front doors.
He pushes open the door with ihs back and quickly enters the code for the security system. He walks past the soundstages to the production office where Luce Grace sits at a computer--his dark hair tousled in frustration.
Haley could never figure out what Luce had done to get blackballed by the tech
industry. He’d sit and code for hours until a problem got
solved. Jean
hired him to launch Virtue's entire operation after the upstart firm he originally contracted with kept missing their deadlines.
“Fancy seeing you here,” Haley quips as he enters the production office.
“Hey,” Luce grunts not looking up from the computer. “How was it ?”
“The usual.”
Jean cut deals with owners of
nightclubs, strip clubs, brothels and bars to run appearances with Virtue’s
performers in exchange for a percentage of the bar tab. Haley was far from a
popular draw like the other performers but he made himself useful; convincing groups to buy
the expensive signature cocktails and giving blow jobs at the brothels during men’s
night. It was long nights and sucked all his energy but he couldn't complain--he
was getting paid to have a good time.
Haley props up the floral coffee mug. “Thought you might need this.”
Luce looks up at him for the first time
and Haley holds back a smile when Luce’s fingers falter on the keys. He
hadn’t meant to roll the top of the shorts up to show nearly all of his recently tanned legs.
Or had he ?
That night at AEX had brought them
from friendly acquaintances to actual friends but Haley wondered if Luce ever
saw him as anything more. If he thought he was desirable or just a pathetic idiot who go in over his
head and needed to be saved from his own mess ?
Just as Luce reaches for the coffee cup, Haley jumps at the sound of typing behind them.
“Oh sh--,” he starts, turning to see Luce wasn’t alone in the office tonight.
Sara Grace, Luce’s mother sat at the computer behind Haley, somehow typing even faster than Luce. She looked deep in concentration on the code jumble on her screen…despite the muted clip of two female performers eating each other out that was stopping and starting on the monitor next to her.
Luce and Sara lived together and Luce had told him she had mild agoraphobia. Haley had only met her once—at the Thanksgiving dinner he’d been invited to by Jean and Minnow. She wasn't anything like how he'd imagined. She'd had Luce as a teenager and was only in her late 40s. She shaved her head and wore loose fitting men's shorts and tank tops. She was a woman of few words and hard stares but seemed to be adored by everyone.
She intimidated Haley.
“Sorry, I didn’t realize you were here,” Haley rambles. “I only bought one cup but I can make you one too--”
“I’m good,” Sara says, not looking up from her monitor. Haley was silently glad because he only owned the one mug. “Luce, you keep fucking up the http request--,”
“Ma, I told you we’re not using--”
“You have to, Luce. Your programming isn’t working," she retorts sternly. “Stop whining and make the edits I said earlier, and I’ll go back to the CSS--”
“That’s five hundred edits--”
“I don’t need to be here,” she says in the voice he'd heard mother's use on their teenagers. “You called me, Luce. I almost have this fixed. Jean’s already given you an extension on this project and he trusted you to finish it--”
“Fine. Jesus, Ma. Fuck,” Luce says under his breath and then to Haley. “It’s been fucking crazy trying to get this e-commerce system up for. I’ll go up and do your PC as soon as we finish this-”
“It can wait,” Haley shrugs. He knew Jean and Charlotte were invested in having a way for users to pay online. “This is obviously more important.”
“Thanks for the coffee,” Luce says taking the mug. “You look beat. You should get some rest.”
At Luce’s words Sara’s staccato typing stops suddenly and the room falls quiet. When Haley looks over at her she is staring at Luce. Then she quickly looks down and resumes typing.
Haley says his good nights and turns to walk back out.
-2-
He pauses at the glass door as a man’s figure ambles down the darkened street past Virtue. He waits
for him to leave before swinging the door open and stepping outside. The
pre-fabricated downtown area of North Las Vegas where Virtue stood was still
mostly commercial and Haley had learned to be cautious of his surroundings at night.
“Angel!,”
The name stops him in his tracks. Stalkers had tracked down Virtue Studios before to see the female performers but never him.
He turns and the man who had ambled by earlier jogs closer. Recognition stills Haley’s heart.
“No,” he shouts at Maxwell’s approaching form. “You can’t be here.”
“Haley, please. God, I’ve fucking missed you,” Maxwell cries. “Angel, I screwed up…I’m sorry.”
Maxwell sways on his feet. His eyes were glassy and his face red. He’d been drinking. Not enough to ignite his rage but enough to think this was a good idea.
“I saw Sky at my parents house last month,” Maxwell rambles in a hushed tone. “He asked me about you. He was so heartbroken when I told him you left us.”
Sky was the one person Haley missed form his life in California. It sickened him that Maxwell still got to visit him after all he’d done.
“I get it, beautiful. I know you’re weren’t happy,” Maxwell sighs. “I’m not perfect but…I’ll try. You proved your point. Let’s go home. Please.”
Maxwell drops to his knees in front of him and Haley steps back against Virtue’s front door, shaking his head.
“No, Maxwell--”
“No ? I paid for your grandmother’s entire fucking funeral…I-I-I took care of you for 7 fucking years,” he says standing. “And you can’t give me a second chance ?”
“Don’t you dare talk about my grandmother, I know what you were doing. I know everything. You ruined my fucking life--,” he spits at Maxwell.
“Oh, don’t be dramatic--”
Over the last seven months of independence Haley had learned a lot. He’d learned Maxwell had been fraudulently cashing in his dead grandmother’s social security and that he’d put $200,000 in credit card debt in Haley’s name. But that hadn't been the worst of it.
“You gave me HIV,” he balks at Maxwell.
“I took precautions,” Maxwell bites. “I made you stop working. I put the pills in your food. You didn’t need to know. I took care of you when I learned you got it--”
“I didn’t get it. You infected me and didn't tell me--”
“Why should it have mattered ? Our viral counts are low and we were supposed to be together forever.”
Haley had fallen incredibly ill the
first weeks after he left Maxwell but he soldiered through it. Then he did his STD screening for Virtue and sent the results without even thinking to look. He'd only even been with Maxwell.
Jean hadn't fired him but he wasn’t allowed to film penetrative sex
with other performers--which cut into his paycheck--so he never said no to any
other scene to make up for it. Most of his clients at the brothels were
surprisingly comfortable with it but he still charged less.
“We might have been together forever,” Haley says. “But you ruined that.”
Maxwell draws up to his full height. “You can act innocent but I know what a horny needy little cunt you are. Who else is going to want to be with you ? You can't afford to push me away.”
Haley was currently in longest dry spells he had since he was17 and started working. But being celibate again wasn’t nearly as hard as he thought it would be.
Haley pushes his back against the door and backs himself into Virtue, locking the glass door behind him. He speeds back down to the production office where Luce and Sara were still sniping at each other quietly.
Luce looks up when he enters, concern worrying his brow at Haley’s uneasy expression.
“Alex ?”
“I...um, Maxwell is outside,” Haley finally says. “He won’t leave--”
The words are barely out of his mouth before Luce bolts up, strides down the hall and throws open the front door.
“I believe he asked you to leave. You’re trespassing,” Luce barks, stalking toward Maxwell.
Luce was built but Maxwell still had 7 inches on him.
“Oh, of course you’re here,” Maxwell responds dryly.
“Get the fuck out.”
Haley tries to step between them but Luce gently pushes him back behind him protectively.
One side of Maxwell’s mouth lifts in bitter amusement at Luce’s actions and he locks eyes with Haley.
“Still finding real men to fight your battles for you, then? Just like I had to do with those redneck perverts you grew up with ?,” Maxwell hisses. “God, Haley, you love playing the little bitch victim. Look at your hair. You can act like a sissy but you're still a man who needs to fight his own--”
Maxwell is cut off by a gunshot. A bullet pings off the streetlight next to his head. Haley’s heart leaps into his chest. He hadn’t even seen Luce pull his weapon.
Then Sara steps in front of Luce, her steely gaze and glock aimed directly at Maxwell.
“Are you fucking kidding ?” Maxwell laughs
“I believe you have been asked to leave--,” Sara says carefully.
“Stay out of this, you crazy bitch--”
Luce unholsters his own concealed firearm and aims for Maxwell’s head as he disengages the safety. Before he can pull the trigger Sara pushes Luce arm down and a series of bullets dispense in the gravel street.
“Ma--,” Luce growls through gritted teeth, batting her arm away.
“Go ahead, Mommy,” Maxwell teases. “Let your boy shoot me. I’m sure Virtue would love the press. You do know the hospital makes all gunshot wound victims file a police report--”
“Not in the morgue,” Luce bites readjusting his aim.
Maxwell dismisses them with a waved a middle finger but walks himself backwards across the street to his car. When he drives off, Sara holsters her gun into her hip but Luce keep his in his grip.
“He’s an asshole. But he’s not worth it. It’s never worth it, Luce.” Sara says, putting her hand on Luce’s arm to relax his grip. “The update is done, the code works. I’m going home. One of you should call the police on him for drunk driving.”
“Thank you,” Haley calls weakly after her.
“Are you okay ?,” Luce says once Sara is gone and he and Haley are left standing outside alone. “Do you think you need to move out ?”
“I’m fine. I don’t think he realizes I live upstairs,” Haley says. “Your mom is…”
“She doesn’t suffer fools,” Luce finishes. “I’ll walk you upstairs. Maybe get started on setting up your computer ?”
Haley nods and Luce follows him down the alley and up the back stairs to his studio. The space was barely 400 square feet, most of which was taken up by the queen-sized mattress he’d bought at a swap meet.
Haley sits on the mattress and pulls the sparkly, thick, zebra print duvet over himself as Luce open the computer boxes with his pocket knife.
“Do you mind if I lay down ?,” Haley asks.
He shakes his head.
“I don't have a TV but I can turn the radio on--”
“I like the quiet.”
Haley picks up the copy of Prisoner of Azkaban he kept on the side of the mattress that was an ever growing pile of things he liked to have close by. He’d bought the books because he didn’t have cable and needed something to occupy his mind on bad days. He liked to pick a chapter from one of the books and read until he fell asleep.
***
-3-
Haley falls asleep almost immediately after lying down and wakes a few hours later to an alien blue glow lighting up the apartment. He cracks open his eyes to see the source of the glow was the computer on his thrifted lavender painted oak desk.
The computer’s glowing monitor screen displayed a video of himself; dressed in latex bondage gear, tied to a bed, and whimpering quietly while he was rammed by a large dildo. It was a video he’d filmed earlier that year for Virtue.
Luce sat in front of the computer, his
eyes trained on the screen and his hand in his lap making a distinct stoking motion. The desk chair
swivels slightly and Haley catches a glimpse of Luce’s profile. He almost forgets to breathe.
He couldn’t fathom how Luce was walking straight with that much swinging between his legs.
Haley’s mind raced.
Was Luce was aware of just how above average he was ? He’d worked security on porn sets for years, he must know.
Did Jean know ? Had he’d ever asked Luce to model ? Or did no one know this information but Haley and what was he supposed to do with it ?
He’s broken out of his thoughts by a small keening sound Luce makes as he clicks the mouse and switches from the lewd video to a photo of Haley. In the photo he was naked and on his knees with his arms bound behind him. It was a softcore teaser photo, his face was partially hidden by his hair and the lighting obscured anything exciting from view. Still, the pace of Luce’s strokes quickens, a sliver of defined abs and a dark happy trail shows when he adjusts his shirt.
Haley quietly moves his hand under his sheets and shimmies his shorts down. He’d never experienced someone experiencing his work before. He hated looking at himself so he concentrates on the man so enthusiastically getting off on a photo of him.
He silently matches Luce stroke for stroke. He has a silent fantasy of Luce finishing into a pair of his underwear and is a little disappointed when Luce pulls a tissue out of his pocket.
Luce turns the computer off and washes his hands in the bathroom. Haley could pretend the sound of the sink woke him but decides against it. Luce hadn’t wanted him to see that.
Or had he ?
Through silted eyes he watches Luce leave a Post-It note on the computer’s keyboard and head for the door.
Haley turns slightly, pretending to still be asleep when Luce walks past his bed.
***
Hours later, when Haley wakes he goes to read the note.
I bookmarked Virtue and other sites you might like (no, not those kind). You are now ready for the 21st Century. Don’t have too much fun. -Luce
2000
San Bernardino, California
Central City Mall
-4-
Alex Haley loved malls. He’d never been to Central City Mall but he saw on a billboard it had a carousel so it was already ranking very high on his list of malls. He liked watch all the families and wander through the different sections of the department stores and make a list of the things he’d buy when he had his own children, husband and house.
But more importantly he liked the food.
There were lots of meal options; options that his therapy group would be proud of him for making but instead he buys a cinnamon sugar pretzel and promises himself he will not only eat the pretzel but keep it in his stomach.
Or he’d eat just half and save the rest for the four hour bus ride back to Las Vegas.
“Haley!”
He turns behind him and his face breaks into a smile at the sight of the 10-year-old boy walking to his table. It had only been a year and a half since he’d seen Skylar Maxwell and he already looked more grown up.
Behind Sky is Lieutenant Lansing Prescott, Maxwell’s ex-partner, who looked like the blue print for Sky’s bright hazel eyes and wavy dark hair. Haley had always thought Sky and Maxwell were blood related but there was no denying Sky and Lansing were biological father and son.
Haley stands and opens his arms on
instinct as Sky approaches. He quickly wonders if 10-year-old boys even did
hugs but Sky runs right into his arms.
“Hi, honey,” he smiles into Sky’s embrace. “Holy crap, you’re almost taller than me.”
“I thought something bad happened to you,” Sky says quietly. “…Cause Dad said you were gone.”
Haley shakes his head and releases Sky from his embrace.
“I just live in Las Vegas now,” he smiles. “For work.”
“By yourself ?”
“Yes… but I have lots of friends.”
Technically he only had two friends, Luce and Minnow--both of whom were severe workaholics. Truthfully, he was more lonely than he’d ever been and found himself in strange depressive episodes when he didn’t have enough to keep him busy and sat in his apartment alone for days.
But Sky didn’t need to know that.
“My grandma got me a Gameboy color,” Sky says. “If you come over to where I live we can play--”
“I’d love that,” Haley smiles and nods to acknowledge Lansing, who nods back.
Lansing is dressed casually in jean shorts and a t-shirt for a charity 10K but his posture is military straight. Haley had purchased two Tommy Hilfiger polos to layer and chinos specifically for this meeting and now he felt overdressed.
Lansing takes a pair of crisp $20 bill out of his wallet and hands them to Sky.
“Sky, here’s money for the arcade.” Lansing says. “ Come back in one hour and we’ll be right here. Just like we talked about , okay ?”
Sky nods, takes the money with wide eyes and races to the arcade on the other side of the food court.
Haley wonders if the lieutenant knew how much damage a kid could do with forty dollars at an arcade. Haley knew Lansing was a around Maxwell's age but he seemed infinitely more mature. He made Haley feel like he should be running along to the arcade with Sky instead of having the grown up conversation with Lansing.
“Well, I can see it now,” Lansing sighs, breaking the silence and sitting at the food court table.
Haley follows his example and sits too.
“See what ?,”
“Why Kenneth decided to implode our life together for you,” he responds. “…Ken was always a man of simple impulses…no offense.”
Haley shrugs. Lansing’s tone was more resigned to the fact than angry.
“Thank you for letting me see Sky,” Haley says.
“Thank you for coming out here to meet with me,” Lansing replies taking out a leather folder packed neatly with legal documents. “I know we talked on the phone but I thought you might like to see the files yourself.”
Haley takes the documents and reads.
Lansing had called Virtue looking for Haley last month. He’d told him Maxwell was being taken to court for sexual assault by a PA at Harmony Productions and he wanted to talk to Haley about a way to help the victim. He’d been skeptical about meeting Lansing but he’d agreed to meet and booked a bus ticket to San Bernardino.
Haley looks over the documents not understanding the legal jargon but pausing on the accusers name and photo. He’d never seen her but she was Maxwell's type; aspiring porn actress, early twenties, gorgeous and covered in tattoos. He starts to read her statement but it curdles his stomach too much.
“I'm told these types of cases never stick,” Lansing explains. “Her lawyers want to have something called a Molineux hearing. It’s where other witnesses can testify to show he had a pattern of abuse and even rape—"
“He never raped me, so...” Haley lies. He couldn’t admit to that publicly.
“I hired a private investigator to find you and it took him less than a day to give me a whole file,” Lansing says. “ Lots of people saw your face the night of the AEX award show in ‘98. If he did something to you the statute of limitations might not be up--”
“Are you helping with this casebecause you actually care about the victim or to stick it to Maxwell for leaving you ?,”
“Both,” he responds coolly.
“I don't want to face him court…I could maybe write something--”
“Not good enough.”
“How long were you with Maxwell ?”
“Four years,” Lansing huffs.
“Imagine doing almost eight--,”
“Imagine being an openly gay officer in the US Military, ” Lansing shoots back. “It technically wasn't even allowed back then--”
“I didn’t know that--”
“There weren't many of us but we all kind of found each other. Ken and I connected but he had a wife and I was his commanding officer. I loved him but I also loved serving my country. He convinced me I could have both. That we could show them a “respectable” gay couple; patriotic, family-oriented with all-American values. I was all in…but Ken kept cheating. Kept making us look bad. They didn't discharge me for coming out but they hid me away doing a job well below my rank. I fucked up my entire career just for him to leave me for an 18-year-old porn star. And then he took custody of my son.”
“I had no idea you existed. Our relationship...it wasn't what you think. Maybe at the beginning but that only lasted a few months,” Haley admits. “I want to help with this case but…I can’t talk about any of it to a courtroom. It’s too hard.”
“Sky’s the same way. It terrifies me.” Lansing sighs working his jaw. “I…I got a little to impassioned and yelled a Knick’s game on TV. Sky had what I can only call a nervous breakdown. He won’t talk. Not with me or his counselors. I'd like to know what he went through.”
“That’s his choice to tell you not mine,” Haley says. “He seems happier now…. he looks just like you…I always thought he was Maxwell’s.”
“No, he’s mine biologically through a surrogate. Only one of us could sign the birth certificate so Ken did. When we dissolved our domestic partnership he exploited the fact that I wasn't on the birth certificate to get full custody. Ken never so much as did one feeding. What father doesn't want to feed his baby ? It killed me when that judge gave Ken full custody.”
“I didn't know.”
“The fucked up part is I’m still a stranger to Sky,” Lansing sighs. “He’s knows Ken’s parents so I let him stay with them every other weekend. They let Ken see him unsupervised which is against the agreement.”
“You know…I never even met Maxwell’s parents,” Haley says.
“Lucky you. I don’t have much family. I want Sky to have some people in his life so I put up with them,” Lansing says and studies Haley carefully. “I like you much better than Ken's enabling twats for parents though... if you’d ever like to…I don’t know write an e-mail or send a card I can give you my contact information.
“I’d really love that,”
Haley quickly scribbles his e-mail address on the paper. The only people he e-mailed were his fans from Virtue and his sister Isla, who’d he’d been able to repair his relationship now that Maxwell was gone. She'd made her way through college and worked a demanding job as an executive assistant to a Chicago hedge fund manager that allowed her to live a life Haley liked to imagine was like Sex and The City.
“I don’t have a lot of family either,” Haley says, thinking of the cute baby Christmas dresses he'd walked by in Bloomingdales. “I’d like to have my own one day. Was it hard…all that surrogate stuff ?,”
Lansing barks a bitter laugh.
“The most difficult thing I’ve ever done.” Lansing says. “It took almost 3 years to conceive and cost us over $40,000. Do you have a significant other ?”
“Kind of.”
It was another lie.
What he did have was an intense crush on his friend who occasionally came over to his apartment to watch movies on a 13 inch television and by the time the credits rolled they were mutually masturbating under the blankets but never talked about or acknowledged it except to figure out who needs to "use the bathroom" first.
“IVF is expensive as hell and not something I would
recommend doing alone,” Lansing says dismissively. “Clinics can be be
particular about who they give eggs to. I can’t imagine how they’d
feel knowing you star in Leather Bound Blowjobs IV,”
“You watch my videos ?,” Haley asks, narrowing his eyes at the specificity.
“I’ve heard,” Lansing says dismissively but the tips of his ears burn red.
“I’m not going to do porn forever. I'm actually getting my GED.”
Another lie.
He’d just failed his GED test for the third time in a row. He had no idea what it was about Lansing that inspired him to lie about his less than stellar life.
Lansing’s face softens and Haley turns to see Sky coming toward them, proudly holding a light up yo-yo. Haley’s heart clinches when Sky gives Lansing his change and says he gave his extra tickets to the little girl in line behind him once he got his prize.
“Haley, did you see the carousel in the mall ?,” Sky asks.
“Not yet--”
“Can we go show him ?,” Sky asks Lansing.
“Why don’t you two go ahead, ,” Lansing smiles “I’ll wait here.”
---
CP!Shawna: Do you really think with all the Harvey Weinstien news no one is going to realize that Molineaux hearings only exist in New York ?
SHV: Shhhh
CP!Shawna: Also this serial is failing the Bechdel Test spectacularly....
Yes, Central City is a real mall and yes, it closed in 2017 ):